Holiday Hacks: Less Stress, More Presence — A Christian Woman’s Guide to Grace-Filled Holidays
The holidays are often painted as the “most wonderful time of the year,” yet they can also be the most stressful. Between family dynamics, financial strain, and the pressure to create the perfect Christmas moment (Hallmark anyone?), even the best of us can feel stretched thin.
I’ve lived through holidays where joy and tension coexisted at the same table. Where a smile covered exhaustion, and conversations tiptoed around old wounds or sensitive subjects. Maybe you’ve been there too — trying to hold the peace while your internal dialogue prays, “Lord, help me not say the wrong thing.”
Nostalgia and the Heart of Home
Despite the chaos, there’s something deeply sacred about the nostalgia the season brings. I often find myself reminiscing about my childhood Christmases — the laughter, the music, the warm glow of twinkle lights. One story my family still laughs about is the year my sister, in her handwritten Christmas list, accidentally spelled barrette as beret.
Sure enough, that Christmas morning she unwrapped a green wool beret. Not exactly what she meant — but she still has it. It now hangs from her Christmas tree as an ornament, and every year someone inevitably puts it on, parading around the living room with laughter that reminds us of simpler times.
It’s moments like those that remind me: joy doesn’t come from everything going perfectly. It comes from connection, memory, and the grace to laugh — especially at ourselves.
Traditions That Tell Our Story
As my own family grew, I found myself curating new traditions while carrying forward the ones that still held meaning. For us, Christmas Eve is sacred — a night of candlelight and community. We attend our church service, singing Silent Night as the sanctuary glows with the soft light of candles. Later, we gather at home for fondue — a long-standing family favorite — and friends drop by for laughter, stories, and a late-night feast.
And yes, every year we open one gift: the matching Christmas pajamas. It’s a tradition my kids now expect (and pretend to resist). There’s something so beautiful about the predictability of it — a little lighthearted fun that signals, “We’re together. We belong.”
Traditions anchor us. They don’t have to be extravagant or picture-perfect; they just have to be meaningful.
Navigating the Hard Stuff
But let’s be real: not every holiday gathering is peaceful.
There are unspoken tensions, relational divides, grief, or even addictions that make being together complicated. Some years, the ache of what’s missing feels louder than the music playing.
It’s in those moments I lean on Romans 12:18:
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on me, live at peace with everyone.”
This verse humbles me every time. It reminds me that peace starts with me — not with everyone agreeing, behaving, or changing, but with how I choose to show up. My boundaries aren’t about controlling others; they’re about stewarding my own heart, tone, and reactions.
When family dynamics get tense, I silently pray for patience and wisdom. Sometimes the best response is a gentle redirect of conversation, a deep breath (don’t underestimate this tactic), or simply choosing silence over sarcasm. Peace isn’t passive — it’s powerful. During difficult convos, I sometimes just get up and go somewhere else, even the bathroom. Or I’ve been known to put my boots on and head outside for a quick walk. Remember, the Holidays are a moment in time, they are not forever. Don’t dwell too much on what goes wrong, just focus on the reason for the season.
