The God of second chances. (Or man shopping with Jesus in tow)

I shared this chapter of my story before but Since it’s wedding season, I thought I’d share my own love mulligan story.

All my life, “real love” was the one thing I wanted most and seemed least likely to get. After enough heartbreak, disappointment, and trying to force what never truly fitted, I got to a place where being alone felt easier than risking more pain. I still wanted real love, but I had stopped believing it would come in the way I had once imagined. No Cinderella story for me, so I thought.

Then I did something I never expected to be doing in my 50s: I joined a dating app and started “man shopping”. At first, it was more just to meet someone to go out for dinner, be friends with. To say I was unimpressed would be putting it mildly. I swiped left – A LOT!. I blocked more men than I can remember. I did not fully know what I wanted, but I absolutely knew what I did not want. I was no longer willing to entertain confusion, compromise my values, or settle just because I was tired of waiting. It was ALL OR NOTHING! 

I wanted:

• A real partner (can we underline that twice somehow?);

• Someone as driven as I was (I even said to my now husband when we met that I didn’t have time for him Monday to Friday!);

• Someone mature;

• Someone who shared my faith, my values, my culture, and my desire to build a real life together.

• I wanted someone to laugh with, pray with, travel with, and do life with.

• Someone who would make my life better.

• Though I was seeking a teammate, I was longing for someone to build the final chapters of my life

• AND, at this stage, I was also looking to have the fairytale: I once wrote in a journal that I wanted to be someone’s favourite hello and hardest goodbye.  I wanted to live the fantasy. I wanted the Hallmark movie love story, hear “I can’t live without you”! Someone to hold hands, to kiss without holding back. Idealistic? Too good to be true? I didn’t care… I was totally ok on my own.

Dating as a woman of faith who always loves too much

In your 20s, it’s about building a life, a career, your first house, kids maybe. But in your 50s, I feel it’s about finding a best friend. Someone you can actually talk and laugh with and plan those last few decades of your life.

I have a career, a car and a house I love. I’m not looking for more kids. I’m looking to travel, to go for dinner, to explore and have a companion I am proud to introduce to friends and family. Someone who will share my passions and hobbies. Someone who will have my back!

People say dating later in life is easier because you are financially stable and know yourself better. LIES! Let me just say this: the pool is small! In fact, to be honest, it’s really a puddle - especially that there are more of them and less of us!  I heard someone say that dating in your 50s is like thrifting: it’s about picking through what is left, trying to find the less smelly and less beat-up thing in the store!

On the app, many men were messaging solely for a physical relationship. I guess after broken marriages, men weren’t looking for anything long term. I’m certainly no spring chicken or a trophy wife but it felt as if men in my age group were looking for women who were at least 10 to 15 years younger. Middle life crisis? I understand we all have baggage and bruises but, for a woman of faith, the pool gets even smaller. Compatibility is not just about chemistry. It is about conviction. It is about whether two people are actually walking in the same direction.

That was the lesson I had already learned the hard way. After spending nearly four years with someone who did not share my faith, I knew I could never make that compromise again. Faith is not a side note in a relationship. It shapes your choices, your priorities, your understanding of love, sacrifice, forgiveness, commitment, and purpose. Scripture is clear that alignment matters. Modern dating says chemistry is enough. The Bible says foundation matters more. One may create excitement for a while. Only the other can sustain a life.

My love mulligan 

Then came Eric. The miracle of our story is that we were not even supposed to meet. We were on two different apps owned by the same company. He was in Kingston, with his search set toward Quebec because of his children. I was in the Greater Toronto Area, with no interest whatsoever in long-distance anything. But after enough left swipes on both sides, somehow the apps made our paths crossed, and there we were. We only realized much later just how unlikely it all was and how God is Lord even over the algorithm. What looked random at the time now feels like one more example of God quietly arranging what I could never have orchestrated myself.

When we first connected, he wanted to meet quickly. I said no. I wanted to make sure we were truly compatible before attraction had the chance to interfere with wisdom. So we texted. A LOT! Then we talked on the phone. That is when we discovered we both had huge French accents – another connection! Three months later, we agreed to meet halfway between our cities. He organized the date. We spent the day walking, talking, laughing, and sharing our stories, our hopes, and the parts of ourselves that mattered most. I fell fast. I fell hard. I finally had found my love story but more than that, this time, it was also about substance.

A little over a year later, during the 2024 holidays, dressed in black, we were married in Bromont surrounded by snow, friends, and family. In my vows, I said that typically vows are often promises made in hope, but mine were made in certainty. That was exactly how it felt. Not fear. Not striving. Not confusion. Certainty.

What moved me most was not simply that I had found my one true love, but that I had finally experienced the kind of love that brings peace. The kind that heals instead of wounds. The kind that pieces you back together and steadies you. The kind that makes the past lose its grip. The kind that reflects, however imperfectly, the love of God.

I had wanted love all my life, but I can honestly say now that I had never fully known it before. Not like this. Through this marriage, I realize that I settled in the past. I just desperately wanted love. I guess I didn’t know better. I since have seen more clearly the tenderness of God, His timing, His protection, and His ability to restore what we thought had passed us by. He did not just bring me a husband. He gave me a second chance!

So for anyone dating and discouraged, here is my advice: do not compromise!

You see,

Marriage is hard.

Relationships are hard.

Entrepreneurship is hard.

Being healthy can be hard.

LIFE IS HARD!

Everything asks something of us. So do not choose a relationship that makes an already hard life even harder. Choose someone who strengthens your walk, protects your peace, and calls you higher, to be the best version of yourself.

Trust God enough to wait for what is right.

Since faith is believing in what we cannot yet see, trust God to be your matchmaker! Trusting the God who is Lord over tomorrow is more than able to handle your love story too.

Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labour in vain. And sometimes, in His mercy, He does not just build. He rebuilds.

Psalm 124: What if the lord had not been on our side?

Psalm 127: unless the lord builds a house the work of builders is wasted

MY VOWS:

Eric, You came into my life like a whirlwind and changed everything. Without a doubt, you are my one great love. You bring me more joy than I ever could have imagined. In just one year, you’ve given me more love than I’ve known in a lifetime—more than I ever thought possible. You make me a better person—a better mom, a better boss, a better daughter, and a better follower of Jesus. I feel truly blessed to be part of your life and to have the privilege of walking this journey with you, starting today and forever.

Traditionally, vows are promises made in hope, but I don’t make these vows in hope—I make them in certainty. I am sure. You are my partner, my lover, my best friend, my soulmate. And today, I don’t just promise; I choose to love you in a way that makes the past fade away. I promise to stand by your side forever, to support and encourage you in all you do. Everything I am and all I have is yours.

These vows aren’t just promises; they are privileges. I get to laugh with you and cry with you. I get to care for you and share with you. I get to build with you and live alongside you. I choose to honor and cherish you—not because I have to, but because I want to. I marry you with my eyes wide open, embracing our future together. You have helped me let go of the past, and I welcome the future with open arms.

Thank you for making me laugh again, for healing my heart, for piecing me back together. I give you this ring as a symbol of a love with no end. Today, I choose you to be my husband, now and forever. This is our new beginning—a new chapter. God has given us a second chance at happiness, and together we will wipe the old canvases of our lives clean, letting God fill them with new, beautiful memories.

Eric, I choose you today, tomorrow, and every day after that. Here and now, I pledge my life to yours. No matter where life leads us, I know that as long as you are there, I’m exactly where I’m meant to be.

---

When Nothing Is Working (Or How to Name the Season You’re In)

There are seasons in business (and in life) where nothing makes sense. You’re working. Showing up. Praying. Doing “all the things”… and still, life stall or worse yet, falls apart.

Opportunities fade away. Revenue slows. Doors that once felt open suddenly close without explanation. And if you’re like me, the question creeps in quickly: What am I doing wrong? Is God closing a door? Is it a test or redirection all together?

If you’re in that place right now, I am too! So, I’ve been trying to name the season (because clarity changes how we respond). Here are the only explanations that actually make sense to me, what I’m learning in the middle of it, and what each season requires from us.

1. A test of your faith

I SHALL NOT FEAR? Right…  easier said than done – especially when you’re on overthinker like me.

Fear has a root. I understand that at its core, fear is the belief that God’s Word won’t work, here, in real life.

We don’t usually say it that way. We call it stress. Overthinking. Responsibility. But strip it down, and it’s this: What if God doesn’t come through? Because the fear of not having enough is really the fear that He won’t provide – even though Scripture says He will supply all your needs.

For me, I think it’s sometimes believing I’m not truly worthy of His grace, His provision, His blessings, or His promises.

A season like this exposes something: Do you actually believe Him and His Word? Because you can say you have faith, but when nothing is working, what you believe resurfaces fast! I heard someone say that worrying (or the fear that He wont show up) is believing He will fail. Ouch! This kind of season forces a decision: Will you believe the promise, or will you believe your fear?

2. The waiting game

After months and months of waiting and believing that God WILL change my situation, this option sounds bleak. I do believe I have great faith. I feel I’ve proven this time and time again, even in sharing my beliefs of God’s upcoming intervention out loud. Still, nothing moved.

But here’s the harder truth: We say we’re waiting on God but what if God is waiting on us? What if the opportunities, the business, the clients, the next level… are already assigned but WE haven’t built the structure to receive them? You can’t receive what you’re not prepared to hold. “Commit your plans to the Lord, and He will establish them.” (Proverbs 16:3)

Plans. Not ideas. Not hopes. Not intentions. Plans, actual steps. Preparation is proof of expectation. If you’re praying for something but not preparing for it, you don’t actually believe it’s coming. You have to give God something tangible, a roadmap to bless.

3. A need for redirection

In Luke 5, the disciples fished all night and caught nothing. These were experienced fishermen, not beginners or amateurs. This was their livelihood, their business. They knew what they were doing. And still — nothing.

Then Jesus told them to cast again, but differently. Same boat. Same water. Same people. Different direction. And suddenly: overflow. The outcome wasn’t tied to effort. They had already proven they were willing to work. It was alignment.

Your business may not be failing because you’re not working hard enough. It may be that you’re casting on the wrong side — without Him.

Sometimes the answer isn’t more effort. It’s a different direction.

While we chase success, God calls us to alignment. “Seek first the kingdom of God… and all these things will be added to you.” Success is not the goal. It’s the byproduct. When you align with what God is doing, everything else follows. God will not bless what He is not part of. So instead of increasing pressure, change direction.

4. Preparation for elevation

Sometimes, the breakdown isn’t about you at all. It’s about what’s around you.

People change or move on. You feel misunderstood, even by people who used to “get” you. Things begin to shift and become uncomfortable. And it feels like loss.

But sometimes God isn’t changing you — because you’re ready. He’s removing what can’t go with you to the next stage of elevation.

You see, elevation requires separation and separation always feels like loss before it feels like growth.

That’s why it feels lonely. That’s why you feel misunderstood.
That’s why you’re outgrowing rooms you once prayed to enter.

It’s not punishment. It’s preparation.

So what if it’s not one but all of them?

What if this season is testing your faith, requiring your preparation, demanding your realignment, and clearing space for what’s next?

Then the answer isn’t panic or hustling to try to fix everything. It’s response.

Don’t shrink. Don’t chase what’s leaving. Don’t force what isn’t working (or what isn’t meant for you).

Because closed doors are not always rejection. Sometimes, they are protection. Sometimes, what feels like loss is actually God making space.

A moment when things are being stripped back, is not about leaving you empty but to make space for what actually should fit and what is meant for you NEXT. Often, It’s heavenly protection. God did promise that ALL THINGS work together for your good – closed doors included. Because what you worry about the most often reveals where you trust God the least.

Pause. Realign. Prepare. Trust. Invite Him in. And then, cast again. 

---