When Grief and Faith Collide
By Jessica Muamba(@mamaafrica_jess), wife of former CFL player and TSN sports analyst Henoc Muamba, on grief, doubt, and deeper trust
I grew up believing that strong faith could protect you from a hard life.
In 2020, I learned that faith doesn’t prevent pain—it carries you through it.
I grew up immersed in faith, thanks to my mother—a devoted African Pentecostal. Christianity wasn’t optional in our home; it was the foundation. From a young age, I learned to pray, to fast, and to trust God. But somewhere along the way, I began to believe that if I did all the right things, I could avoid life’s hardest moments.
I believed that faith, if practiced well enough, could protect me from pain.
In 2020, that belief was shaken.
While pregnant with my second child, I lost my mom to COVID. I was devastated. I had prayed. I had believed for healing. I was expecting a miracle. And when it didn’t come, I found myself in a deep crisis of faith—questioning what I believed, wondering if I had done something wrong, and trying to make sense of a loss that didn’t make sense.
In that moment, I was faced with a choice: walk away from my faith, or surrender more deeply than I ever had before.
By God’s grace, I chose surrender.
In the midst of grief, I anchored myself in what I still had—my husband, my daughter Thea, and the life growing inside me. I chose to be present for my family and to care for my younger sister in a way that would honor my mom. At the same time, I began to lean into fitness, and it became an unexpected outlet for healing—strengthening not just my body, but helping me process what my heart was carrying.
And even in the tension of loss, I began to see something profound: while I was grieving the loss of a life, I was also carrying new life.
That realization didn’t remove the pain—but it gave me perspective. It reminded me that even in sorrow, God is still at work.
Today, I carry my mother’s legacy both in how I live and through my platform, “Mama Africa,” where I share hope with others walking through grief. My joy is no longer tied to circumstance—it is rooted in Christ. And that is the message I carry: even in loss, God restores, and hope is still alive.
Early in my grief journey, God revealed three truths that transformed my perspective:
1. My faith isn’t in outcomes; it’s in Him.
I had to confront the reality that God’s sovereignty isn’t proven by miracles on my terms. It’s revealed in how He sustains us—even when healing doesn’t look the way we hoped. I don’t just share a story of loss; I share how God gave me a new song in the middle of it.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.” — Proverbs 3:5
2. We don’t own the people we love—we are given the gift of experiencing them.
Losing my mom shifted my perspective from holding on, to appreciating deeply. She was never mine to keep—she was entrusted to me for a time. And I am grateful for every moment I had with her.
“The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” — Job 1:21
3. Sometimes hard things happen without explanation—but hope is still available.
I had to accept that not every loss comes with a clear reason. We live in a broken world, and even good people experience deep pain. But Jesus reminds us that trouble is not the end of the story—He has already overcome it.
“In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” — John 16:33
This is still a journey. I am still growing, still healing, still learning to trust God more deeply.
But today, my faith is no longer built on what I hope God will do—it is built on who He is.
And that has changed everything.
Follow Jessica Muamba on Instagram @mamaafrica_jess or TikTok @mamaafricajess
